First Nite “Out”

(This flash fiction first appeared on my Tumblr in January 2012)

Jamie steps off the bus nervous in the short, tight black skirt. The black nylons keep everything tucked just right even as walking becomes more difficult in the four-inch heels that “she” has opted to wear.

”She.” Jamie does not even know how to refer to his self, her self, or whatever he or she may be. She decides on “she” for tonight. Nervous, excited and more than a little ignorant of this new world. There is so much to explore now that she has decided to be herself. A look in her compact does nothing to settle her nerves and worries that she may be a walking caricature pick at her mind.

Is the white sweater too loose, announcing that she is trying to hide? Is it too tight, showing off just how fake her bosom of jello filled balloons are? Is the pink shirt underneath too “flaming?” Her mirror goes back to her purse as she spots and waves to her friend from the college bookstore. Awkwardly she steps toward the other woman.

“Hey baby!” The frat boy jumps in front of her, unnoticed until now. He and his friends point, laugh and clap as they stumble away. “Theyknowtheyknowtheyknow,” screams frantically through Jamie’s head and she desperately tries to fight back the tears. Her friend runs up to the frozen, trembling, embarrassed girl, the one who thinks “girl” in quotes when she thinks of herself. She rubs Jamie’s back, assuring her that the frat boys were assholes and “don’t let them ruin your big night.”

Jamie nods her head and forces a smile. As they walk up to the bouncer she bites her lip, reaching in her purse for her ID.


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