Repeating The Offense

English: A worn, black leather belt with buckle.

English: A worn, black leather belt with buckle. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Corey keeps his right hand in his pocket as he drinks his coffee. He honestly is not thinking about how that might be a subconscious move, a desire to keep the weapon out of sight and out of mind, but if you were to ask him he would probably acknowledge you had a good point. He does not want to think about that hand or what it did just minutes ago. His shame threatens to choke him. It nearly frightens him into a closet where he does not have to admit to himself what he has done. No, Corey may not know that he might be hiding his hand from himself, and his victim, but the sting reminds him of the truth.

He had always promised that he would never be like his father. Dad kept five belts that he never wore hanging in the rec room closet. You never knew when, where, or why, but the old man would scowl and point in the direction of that closet, and Corey and his brothers knew that they were to go and pick the instrument of their punishment.

Sometimes, the bad times, he would not even wait and would take his frustration out on them with his bare hands. Those were some of the worst moments of Corey’s childhood, those chaotic moments of fear and violence that left him bruised though after a while he learned not to cry because that just made it worse.

It had been building for a while. A lost contract here, a flat tire there, and an endless parade of minor frustrations. Corey had to be tough though. Do not let it get to you, only weaklings let it get to them and he could never tell you why he thought that bit of advice from a man he hated as much as he loved was any good. It was just how he was programmed.

So in a moment of weakness he lashed out at Mason, over an accidentally deleted e-mail. It was so quick he did not even have time to process it until his son was in his room crying. Corey is not stupid, or selfish, he will apologize to his boy. He will be stronger than the old man, and get the help he needs. His wife says nothing as he passes her to swallow his pride and save his child.

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